The ‘No Sleepover’ Rule Refuses to Assimilate

For Varnitha Devadiga, who grew up in Karnataka, India, sleepovers were some of her most memorable childhood moments. Not because of the experience, but because they sparked some of the worst arguments with her mother.

Even before she could finish her request, her mother would say no. “Why do you have to go at night only?” her mother would ask, telling her to hang out with her friends during the daytime. “This is not your age to do all this first of all, and you guys are too young — you won’t understand.”

This is a familiar story in many South Asian and immigrant families at large. Padma Lakshmi famously said she wasn’t allowed to have sleepovers, and she’s maintained the same rule for her daughter. “My attitude was like if you want to sleep away from home, you should get into college,” Lakshmi said. “Brown folk do not let their children sleep away.” Vivek Ramaswamy faced backlash for saying American kids would do better if they had “fewer sleepovers.” The Juggernaut dove into why sleepovers are so divisive and why the recent #nosleepovers movement has taken over our feeds. Were our parents right all along?